Gone . . . but not forgotten.

Written by Kimberly Hall

Photo by Aaron Burden

Some days I can walk into a room and forget what I was looking for.  It’s strange how I can’t remember some of the smallest things I did last week or last month, yet I can vividly remember some events that happened twenty years ago.  

On June 8, 2001, I was sitting in a work meeting on a gloomy Friday afternoon, looking forward to the weekend.  During the meeting, there was a brief knock at the door. The HR manager peeked her head in and motioned for me to come into the hallway.  In the prior month, our department had just gone through a reduction in workforce, so in that moment, I thought to myself, I’m about to lose my job.  

I walked with her down the hall into a conference room only to see two men in uniform.  I knew in my heart what that meant.  I remember falling to my knees, tears streaming down my face. “Please tell me that my husband is only hurt,” I pleaded with the two officers.  The Casualty Assistance Calls Officer (CACO) said, “I can’t do that ma’am.” He advised me at that moment that my husband had been in a fatal plane crash. I don’t remember much after that moment . . . except that I felt like my heart had been ripped apart.  

It’s so hard to believe it’s been twenty years since Bantee left this earth. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can see his bright eyes and his big goofy smile, and I can feel his presence.  It took me more than ten years to start talking to him when I felt his presence.  It was only fitting, I thought, that I tell him he had a niece and nephew, that Cameron was following his passion, and that I had started a business. I would even jokingly tell him about my dating life. I would imagine him laughing, joking, and being proud of our accomplishments.  Bantee was that person who always wanted the people he loved to be happy and to live life to their fullest potential. 

I’ve been able to keep Bantee’s memory alive through several YAMA (Young Aspiring Minority Aviators) scholarship awards, by sharing funny stories, by honoring him through run for the fallen, and by talking about him to anyone who cared to listen.  He was so charismatic, smart, loving, compassionate—just a wonderful human being overall.  I smile every time I think about him and the lives he touched.  Yes, it’s been twenty years gone, but Bantee Hall II will never be forgotten.